What to expect?

We start with an initial intake appointment with ample time to discuss your concerns, your sexual health history, your lifestyle and other issues that may be contributing to the overall health of your sex and relationship.  

During the intake session you can decide if you’d like to proceed with booking a coaching package or individual ongoing sessions. 

Safe space to discuss sex and intimacy. 

People often come to me from backgrounds where talking about sex has been taboo. Within a safe and supportive container many folks feel relaxed and finally able to express themselves. 

In addition to discussion, couples will be guided through specific exercises. These exercises may involve ways to touch to build arousal and intimacy, communication tools to be more effective at asking for what you want and  Gottman Method exercises to build intimacy and trust as well as resolve and heal conflict. 

All intimacy exercises are G-rated in session. 

In addition to weekly virtual appointments each client is offered suggested HomePlay exercises to do outside of session.  These exercises are suggested as a way to advance your knowledge of your sexuality, build intimacy and trust with your partner and practice skills that will take your knowledge of your own sexuality and that of your partner to the next level.  

In addition to working with couples, I work with individuals who are in a relationship and struggling with ED, EE, porn use or overuse, pelvic floor pain, anorgasmia, low libido and arousal and/or lack of sexual knowledge.

Kink friendly, trauma informed and open to all sexual orientations, genders and gender expressions. 

Please feel free to reach out with any questions!

 

The Gottman Method

As a Gottman Method 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work Leader I teach couples practical tools and exercises to better their relationships. At the heart of healthy, satisfying sex is good communication, healthy conflict styles, knowing each other’s inner world, and deep intimacy.

The Gottman Method is a research based method that increases all of the most important factors that enable a healthy relationship to thrive. In this container of trust and commitment couples can flourish in their sex lives.

Certified in Level 1 & 2, Gottman Method Couples Recovery & 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work 

Restorative practices 

I bring in the core concepts of restorative practices in the areas of communication, healthy agreements and conflict negotiation. This work is powerful! By creating relationship agreements, couples team building exercises, and a trauma-informed safe space for challenging conversations positive transformation and deep trust can be had. 

Mindfulness for Stress Reduction 

High cortisol levels and a fast paced life can be at the core of sexual concerns. By using mindfulness techniques couples can bring their stress levels down and experience more pleasure and satisfaction in their lovemaking. 

Mindfulness works wonders for those struggling with all aspects of their sexuality. 

Erectile dysfunction, early or delayed ejaculation, pelvic floor pain (including vaginismus and dyspareunia), performance anxiety and so much more can all be transformed using mindfulness.

Custom mindfulness curriculum is given to couples that includes mindfulness exercises for various issues including weaning from porn overuse, achieving a mindful masturbation practice and connecting more deeply with your partner. 

In our sessions we always start with a mindful meditation as a way to break from the busy day, get into our bodies and begin the exciting work of healing.

Somatic awareness practices

I have developed my Erotic Fundamentals and other HomePlay Exercises through many years of working with couples. 

I believe that it is through doing somatic (body-based) exercises that true intimacy and connection can happen.  It is not enough just to talk about sex and intimacy, couples need practices that will foster connection for true transformation to happen.  

Each client has exercises to do in between session which strengthens intimacy and helps unlearn old habits and learn new, rewarding habits that will engender increased pleasure and sensation in the body. 

Sex education 

Many couples have only had basic sex education or none at all.  It is rare for people to really understand how their bodies work.  There are a lot of myths about human sexuality that we get from societal messages and scripts, social media, mainstream media and religious or cultural upbringing.  It is vital that people understand how their bodies actually function so that they can be empowered to make changes that are sustainable and pleasurable.  

Hormone education 

The emphasis of hormone education is on: 

1. How human sexuality changes over our lifespan.  Couples complain that they are not having the kind of sex they had when they were younger. They judge themselves and their partner and compare themselves to how they used to be.  It is imperative to understand how hormone changes happen in the body over time and to provide options that you can choose to better function optimally. 

2. We discuss how high levels of the hormones cortisol and adrenaline decrease pleasure, sexual function and create dysfunctions in the body. You will learn strategies to bio-hack this system and lower cortisol levels thereby, enabling sexual function. 

3. Additionally, we discuss all the exciting ways you can feel yummy hormones such as oxytocin and dopamine and ways to boost testosterone naturally. 

Neuroscience

Neuroscience shows us that our brains are not stuck in a rut but that they are constantly evolving and changing.  We call this neuroplasticity.  By harnessing the power of neuroplasticity through HomePlay exercises couples can make gradual and lasting changes in their connections with their bodies, their mindset and each other.  

Sex positive & non-judgmental 

Sexologists do not take the view that there Is something “wrong” with you.  We believe that due to negative messages about sexuality, lack of communication skills and busy lives people get Into situations where things just aren’t going well.  This Is also true for stress, anxiety and the sexual health Issues that can happen as a result.  It Is not that there Is something wrong rather, something needs to chnge.  The view of sex positivity Is that by seeing ourselves as whole, perfect and complete rather than damaged and defected we can make Important, effective and lasting change while growing more and more healthy and empowered.